Wednesday, October 14, 2009

how to know if you're on a date

Have you ever been out with someone when you weren't sure what to make of it all?
I'm convinced that if there was one reason why girls and guys aren't meant to be 'just friends' - this is it.
When you're out with a bunch of people, it's cool - you know where you stand with the fellas you're with. You're in the 'friend zone'.
But what if its just you+him?
Did I mention that he's not gay? (that would make things SO much simpler)
How do you know that your little one-on-one is not something more?
If you're the only one he asked out - is that a date?
If he opens your car door for you - is that a date?
If he pays for your dinner - is that a date?
I wish I knew the answer to these questions...
Sometimes I think guys like keeping you questioning - it gives them an opt out if it turns out that you're just not that into him.


Jacob Da Jew said...

-Does he stare at you?

-Does he say "Gee, that was fun, we should do this more often"?

If yes, dating is on da mind.

Data said...

If you were gay it would make things a lot simpler. At least that would be Biblically permitted.

Anonymous said...

MM, you make a very good point. I always like reading your blog because you keep it real. I think it depends on the guy. One of my good guy friends used to treat me to dinner but we knew it was just a friend thing, he's like my brother. He would treat my friend the same. My friend both agree that the guy should pay only if it's a real date, so now we both only split the cost when we go for food with him. It's not that I only want the guy to pay for dinner ( I wouldn't mind splitting on a real date), but I like having clear cut signs that it's a real date. However, I was hanging out in a group with another girl and two guys, and one of the guys (whom I liked at the time) later called that event a double date. I had no idea that was a date, the said guy called me up to "hang out and go for pizza." SO yeah guys are a mystery! But you gotta love em' :)

Anon said...

Re: data

#1 BEING gay is not assur min haTorah for anyone (I think). It's the BEHAVIOR that is the problem.

#2 Female gay behavior is definitely NOT Biblically permitted. (See the Rambam's Mishnah Torah Hilchos Issurei Bi'ah, 21:8 -- copied below)

It may not be punished as harshly as by a man, but it is still a lo sa'aseh:

ח נשים המסוללות זו בזו--אסור, וממעשה מצריים הוא שהוזהרנו עליו: שנאמר "כמעשה ארץ מצריים . . . לא תעשו" (ויקרא יח,ג); ואמרו חכמים, מה היו עושים--איש נושא איש, ואישה נושאה אישה, ואישה נישאת לשני אנשים.

N said...

when im out with a girl i can never really tell what she's thinking either! there are definitely times when i've been out with a "friend" when i've gotten very mixed signals lol