Wednesday, November 12, 2008

forgetting my brachas

I had a convo about this with my good friend Leah the other day.
I wasn't raised yeshivish-style. I learned that brachas existed, but it was never really enforced.
I remember doing pretty poorly on our fourth grade quiz on brachot - I could never figure out what to say over cornflakes or rice krispies!
In elementary school, they didn't expect us to say brachos before we ate. For benching, one not-so-lucky student would have to say the prayer out loud over a loudspeaker in the cafeteria for all to hear. Some kids were pretty embarassed to do this - especially if their hebrew skills were lacking. I, on the other hand, always loved being the center of attention - still do! But while I now know all the words to Bircat Hamazon, I still rarely say it.
My high school had washing cups - but only the really frum Rabbis or kids who were on the verge of flipping out ever used those. I would sometimes wash too - but only if all my friends were doing it. Good thing I didn't follow that trend with drugs.
My mother sometimes reminds me to thank G-d before I eat a fruit - I guess she doesn't think G-d has as much of a connection to chocolate or pretzels. But except for those rare occasions, I still have trouble remembering to stop before I eat.
And like most ModOrth families, my family always benches after a meal - on Shabbos. I know my father benches after every meal, but everyone else is usually long gone from the table and back in front of a tv or computer or out of the house, when that happens.
So why don't I say my brachas?
It's not that I don't want to.
It's just that I'm not programmed to.
And partly lazy.


Frayda said...

I know what you mean. I was brought up in a yeshivish household but now that I'm out of the house I get lazy about saying brachos. Mostly bentching. But I'm working on it.

Anonymous said...

Brochos are automatic for me. I thought I went to a modern school, but they put a lot of emphasis on saying brochos. I guess modern means different things.
(It was coed btw.)

Maidel said...

i wish brachas were automatic for me....

The Babysitter said...

I'm exactly the same way as you. Every time we have to take on a thing to do, I always take on to say brachos, and I never get around to it. The only Bracha I got used to saying is a Shehakal before I take a drink of water. Then Shabbos is the only time I wash and bench. We also had it that way by elem school, that one person benched over the mic.

I so totally want to fix this happy, I want it to become automatic, I want to be able to raise my kids where they say modeh ani wash negel vasser in the morning and do stuff like that. I know I should probably start before I get married and have kids, so that I can get used to it.

You just have to start with a little at a time so that it shouldn't become to overwhelming.

It's funny, cause I used to always say that I'm good with the bein adom lichavairo, but not so much with the bein adom lamakom. But we learned that bein adom lichavairo is double, because every person has a tzelom elokim, so at least I'm comforted by that.

Maestri said...


You know, habits can change.
Sometimes they improve.
Especially if you want to please Hashem and bless Him for all the good things that He gives you.