i hate tights

Tights are the bane of my existence. Call them hose, pantyhose, nylons, stockings, whatever you like. I hate them all.
As a Frum girl who only wears skirts, tights are a necessity in the winter. But why oh why do they have to be so d*mned uncomfortable??
I remember making my mother crazy in elementary school, going through dozens of tights each morning. Some were too scratchy, some too tight, some too loose, some too twisted. Just like they are today.
I got smart later on and stuck to wearing leggings under my uniform. They weren't as in style then as they are now, but it sure beat having to keep your legs shaved!
But then post-high school, when I started saying goodbye to jeans (which by the way are the greatest invention of the 20th century - they look great with everything!), I couldn't wear leggings any more. For one, they weren't in style, and secondly, it's a hard look to pull off if no one else in your school is doing it.
So I started wearing tights.
For a second in seminary, when I was on the verge of a brainwash, I actually thought about whether I wanted to go reallly shtark - you know, wear pantyhose in the summer. But then I thought again, and my dreams to be a good Bais Yacov girl when down the drain.
So instead I settled on being me. A girl who refuses to wear any type of pantyhose unless the weather requires it.
If it's warm out - my legs are bare. I don't care if I'm going to work or going to a yeshivish wedding. What's the point of pantyhose that's the same color as my skin? It's not like there's some kind of Frummie Force that checks out every girls' legs... (or is there? if there is, let's hope they're women - actually.... maybe not) I'm definitely not going to wear hose for the sake of wearing them.
So when fall comes around, I finally give in. I wear those thick black DKNY tights that actually do keep me warm. Isn't that what they're for?
Sometimes I'll buy other brands - you know, whatever is on sale (tights are the one thing that you should never buy full price if you can avoid it - because no matter how much you paid, they WILL tear). But then when I do buy other brands, that's when I go nuts. One pair will fit, another will not. But because tights rarely have labels - I can never tell which brands are worth buying again and which are not.
The worst is when your tights go crazy while you're wearing them out. They roll up or roll down, get twisted - and when you're wearing a dress, it ain't easy to fix.
Some girl friends and I were walking home one winter's Shabbos with one of our newly-married friends + her new hubby. New Hubby+Bride were walking slightly ahead when one friend whispers to the rest of us "My tights are falling!". The zipper on her coat had gotten stuck so she couldn't reach her waist to pull them up. So there was nothing she could do to keep them from falling down. "She twisted her ankle," we told the new couple, "Don't worry about us, we'll walk slowly with her, you two go ahead". The New Hubby seemed really concerned. We finally persuaded him+new wife to go ahead and not wait.
But then when my friend looked down, her tights were at her ankles!