Wednesday, July 9, 2008

facebook = not tznius?

oy vey. these shadchans give me headaches. one of my friends comes back from one shadachan who tells her that she shouldn't be on facebook, because it doesn't look good. another friend comes back from another shadchan who herself is on facebook!

so which is it? how frum is facebook?

9 comments:

smb said...

maybe the shadchan has a purpose there, like trying to help singles. But I see what you're saying.

I think that FB is as tznius as we make it.

Single And Jewish said...

it depends how frum you are. most frum people would totally be against facebook i think.

but honestly would you like to marry someone who doesnt know what facebook is? i think the biggest problem when it comes to shadchanim is we are all trying to be what we are not. we are worried what the shachan will say. the shadchan should know EXACTLY how we are, that way we have a better chance of getting the right shiduch!

Anonymous said...

facebook is actually very good for shidduchim. you can check out what a person is into and who their friends are. this gives you some idea of the person's personality.

Single And Jewish said...

frayda, of course it is good for shiduchim if the other one is on facebook too. maybe there should be a facebook shadchan exclusively for facebook members!!! can be good

Lion of Zion said...

my wife knows so people on facebooks she calls it frumbook

Anonymous said...

Facebook is not frum at all but all the frummies I know who are on facebook just remove their profiles from public searches- so the only way you can see that they are on facebook is by being friends with them- they must find you.

I utilize facebook for backround checks see who their friends are etc... its great for pre-shidduch stalking.

Anonymous said...

frayda- totally!
if u c the guy is friends with not-tznius girls, or has bad pics of h/s up, then u no to stay away

Anonymous said...

Ok, we all know people use facebook to check up on people for shidduchim.
It's so handy! Lets you weed out all those satan worshipers and perverts.

But seriously, its a tool like anything else. You can use it correctly or incorrectly.

If you're not into blanket statements banning things ("sneakers are evil") then, as long as you trust yourself, facebook should be fine. Assuming your trust is well-founded.

Jewish Side of Babysitter said...

My father used facebook to screen suggestions, it helps so much, you get all the info about the person, you see all their pictures, know their interests. Its the perfect Shidduch profile.